No Vaccine Available...

**I thought about not posting this till the fool updates her own blog. But I'm being nice. Today and today only.** So, I have this friend. Let's call her Erica, because, well, that's her name, and I am not one to change names to protect the guilty. It's just how I roll. Last Sunday, Erica and her Miss came over to play. There are some really awesome parks around here. Well, we decided that wearing the kids out would be a better idea. So that we could have an evening of peace later. Well, this meant a trek to the Shopette. The 7-11 of the military world. And oh dear... Now, I always have "something" happen to me. It's a fact of life. But never, ever, is what happens to me as crazy as what happens to Erica. Yes, my dog gets peed on, and my daughter has two dads, and I can't eat a sandwich without injuring myself. Erica, on the other hand, has things happen that are full of the crazy. Like little old men in grocery stores. I always think she's got more crazy going on than I do. (She just doesn't always tell the Internet.) What I do know for a fact, is that HER type of crazy, the type of crazy that leaves you going, HUH?, is contagious. While we were walking across the parking lot into the building, a lady hangs herself out of her car window and starts yelling at us. She was drunk in the middle of a Sunday afternoon, in a parking lot at the liquor store. The point of her story was, as far as I could tell, was that she was at "the Walgreens" and while she was looking at the costumes, she saw a card with Barbies on it, and our children would look great in them, and they are inexpensive, and our daughters are gorgeous. I'm not hanging out with Erica in public anymore.

Happy Birthday my hooker!

Jo had a birthday today. And I love telling the Internet on her. I'm still trying to figure out how she and I are related, since our husbands are life partners. (And I touch her boobs for scientific reasons, something one should only do with family!) Happy Birthday!!!

If it's not one thing...

Today was day 1 of moving, and it has been one of the longest days of my life. It started last night, well, early this morning. I hadn't gone to bed yet, so technically, it was STILL YESTERDAY. (Baby Sister and I came up with that years ago. Made us feel better about sleeping till noon.) I was putting my pajamas. For some reason (probably because I am a true blonde) I tripped on air. Or the waistband of my shorts, who knows. What I do know, is that to catch myself, I put my leg down on the ground. Instead of my whole foot, only my big toe hit, and all of my weight on it. The toe is most definately broken. It hurts so much I think it would have hurt less to chop it off. (I also think that I should cut my head off when I get headaches.) We then got up early and got ready to start the move by going to the housing office and picking up our keys. While driving to the house, I tell the Hubs that if we end up with the blue counters I will shoot myself. I should have NOT said that. Because about a minute after being in the house, Hubs said "Nice knowing you!"

The other thing you will notice in this picture, besides the flourescent baby blue counters, is that there is a giant plug,, and a hole where "something" should be. We didn't have a FRIDGE!!!! To make it an even better story is that the housing lady (who was making sure that we could get in) said

"Well that's funny. It was here yesterday."

Yeah. That's really funny lady! She said she would "get back to us" about the fridge. I was NOT going to go very long without cold storage. I have ice cream to worry about! She called back a bit later, telling us that the maintenance people had noticed the motor had gone out in the other one, so they were planning on replacing it before the new tenants were scheduled to move it.

Who are these new tenants? And I hope they don't snore.

Not only did we NOT HAVE A FRIDGE! (Yes, I know that people buy houses without appliances, but we have no other options for on base housing) My ID was missing. Is missing actually. Big Z is pleading the First born. She didn't do it. z chimped it up and threw it away. (Chopped) We can't find it.

Then there was a HUGE issue with getting a replacement one. Involving me (again) threatening someone with bodily harm, or pulling the "my husband outranks you" card. I hope I never have to play that in situations like that. I can't stand people who do that. That's another rank for another day. An uneventful day.

I moved three loads of stuff and will move a bunch more tomorrow. With help. Because my friends are beyond awesome. It's why I keep them. Their awesomeness.

There will be pictures tomorrow. Of the house. And I'm going to need y'all help. I'm going to have an extra room. Input will be appreciated, but not till tomorrow.

(Little Z pooped in the tub again too. Because it wasn't a crappy enough day!)

It wasn't THAT good...

So, tonight Holly and I went to dinner, to celebrate my birthday and her 4.0 GPA!!!! (Way more exciting than my birthday!) So here's the evening in a nutshell. First, I had to decide on the shoes I wanted to wear. So I opted for the cutest ones I could find two of. Which were these.I love this picture because my legs look really long, and my belly looks really flat. It's fantastic! But the shoes, make my big feet look small, which is also good. Because big ol' clunky feet are not a great fashion statement. These are the ones I got for The Hub's graduation from Airman Leadership School. I love them. This is a terrible picture, but I had to share the weird drink I highly enjoyed with dinner. It was a Strawberry Basil Lemonade. It was made with lemonade, strawberry Smirnoff, and basil. Something at the Melting Pot makes me try new food. (First place I ever had apples and cheese, and even capers.) It was really good, pretty, and odd at first. The flavor was sooo good. The only GF cooking broth on the menu is the really long word, Bourguignonne. It's plain, so it doesn't have a bunch of flavor, but the dippers are good, and are supposed to all be GF. (Our waitress was GREAT about the whole gluten thing.) Isn't it weird how we went OUT to eat, but cooked our own food? This kinda bugs me about the whole thing, but it's so stinkin' good, I let it slide. However, there is one thing that I cannot stand. Loud annoying drunk people.This lady, seen here, coming back from the bathroom. was drunk before she even sat down to dinner. That's not a problem for me. (I'm 26 and have drunk parties at my house that result in broken baby gates.) The problem I had was that I could hear everything that she was talking about, and that she was practically THINKING! I must tell you, this lady really really really enjoyed her food. The "When Harry Met Sally" scene has NOTHING on this lady with a pot of melted cheese in front of her. We were embarrassed for the guy she was with. And she was STILL drinking. Three drinks while she was there. (I know that she couldn't think of the candy that comes in a plastic wrapper. Duh! Everyone should know THAT one...) It was so bad that Holly went and asked that someone say something to her. I guess you aren't allowed to tell people to shut up in a restaurant. But they didn't say we couldn't stab her with our fondue forks. They couldn't move THEM but we could go sit at a bar table if WE wanted. Which seems ridiculous to me, because we were there first. It was so bad, I had to order a drink to go with my dessert. A Nutty Irishman. It was yum. While we were having dinner, Holly's evil Oreo encrusted marshmallow contaminated a banana slice. This is the banana with the evil on it. Do you see that? It's crazy. Damn regular eaters! I shall leave you with a brief video/sound clip. If you can't understand it, the LOUD voice you hear is crazy drunk lady. Talking about someone I don't know, nor do I care to know about. I came up with a plan to make her shut up, and Holly is on the phone to Chef asking for ideas. My idea was the best I think. Crazy Lady Sound Bite