Flu Mist ~ Now with More Screaming

Last week, I had to take the childrens to get our flu "shots". Since none of us are in a high risk category, we get to have the flu shot up our noses. I liken this experience to what it might be like to snort peanut butter. It just feels so gross going down the back of your throat. Last year, my kids were perfect. The hardest part of getting them to inhale live germs was not allowing them to blow their noses for a half an hour. This year? Nose blowing was the least of my problems.

Actually, the problem STARTED this past summer. While we were home visiting family in Indiana, *Z* got sick and we had to take her to the emergency room. At the ER, they decided to test her for the flu. Do you know how they do that? They shove a Q-tip up your nostril. Poor Big Z has been having issues with nose bleeds since she was about 20 months old. She had had a big bleed that morning. And shoving the Q-tip up there made it happen again. So she's not too keen on things in her nose.

When it was time for her vaccination, my lovely daughter LOST HER DAMN MIND. There is no other way to describe what happened to her in that small room in the immunization clinic. I threatened to have the nurse get a needle and have her give her a shot. And I think I would have had her do that, if the shot could have gone in her arm. In the end, I had to lay her down on the bed and hold her down. Her crying fit lasted more than half an hour. Which caused her sister, who didn't care one way or the other about the flu mist, cry. All Little Z cared about was the Barbie sticker after it was over.

And Big Z? She is still mad she didn't get a sticker!

Of Mad Cow, and other diseases...

When you donate blood, you must fill out a small survey so that they may assess your current health. Some of the questions are also used to let you know that you are not capable of donating blood at that moment. Things like, being on certain medications, or having a piercing less than 6 months old, or a tattoo younger than a year old. The ONE question that I always found to be none of their flippin' business was this: "Have you had sexual intercourse with someone who has lived in Europe since 1980?" Um? Isn't that extremely nosy, and specific? I never understood why that would exclude someone from giving blood, but I have since been educated as to how dumb that question ACTUALLY is. In the 1980s, there was an outbreak of Mad Cow disease. And everyone there was excluded from giving blood for the rest of their known lives. And so now is everyone who has had sex with those people. Guess what?! The Hubs lived in Europe after 1980... I'm O- and can no longer donate blood. Unless I lie, and say we've never had mattress mambo. (Which would make me birthing his two children extremely hard to explain!) Last Friday, I went to the dentist and was placed on antibiotics for an infection. On Thursday, I discovered two spots that looked to be spider bites on my hip. Hubs had said he found a spider or two in our room, so we thought nothing of it. (It wasn't a black widow or brown recluse, so I wasn't worried about the bites.) Yesterday however, I woke up with about 1/4 of my body covered in big, itchy, swollen, red welts. Hives on a grand scale. I am allergic to anything listed with "cilin" in the name. I have since gone to the clinic (yesterday) and the ER today (because it's not about 1/3 of my body covered by these spots). My purse looks like a pharmacy. And now, I not only could have gotten Mad Cow disease as an STD, but I look like a leper. Happy Freakin' Valentine's Day ya heifers!

Just Say No To Snorting

I have snorted two separate substances in my lifetime.

Equal, and now the flu.

I have NO CLUE why I have snorted Equal. (Only Equal though, not Sweet n Low) It was high school. It was a small town. There wasn't much to do.

The flu however, I snort because medical professionals tell me it's perfectly safe.

They lied. I'm dying. So here is the image I want you all to remember me by, while I go take a nap and drink some juice.

If it's not one thing...

Today was day 1 of moving, and it has been one of the longest days of my life. It started last night, well, early this morning. I hadn't gone to bed yet, so technically, it was STILL YESTERDAY. (Baby Sister and I came up with that years ago. Made us feel better about sleeping till noon.) I was putting my pajamas. For some reason (probably because I am a true blonde) I tripped on air. Or the waistband of my shorts, who knows. What I do know, is that to catch myself, I put my leg down on the ground. Instead of my whole foot, only my big toe hit, and all of my weight on it. The toe is most definately broken. It hurts so much I think it would have hurt less to chop it off. (I also think that I should cut my head off when I get headaches.) We then got up early and got ready to start the move by going to the housing office and picking up our keys. While driving to the house, I tell the Hubs that if we end up with the blue counters I will shoot myself. I should have NOT said that. Because about a minute after being in the house, Hubs said "Nice knowing you!"

The other thing you will notice in this picture, besides the flourescent baby blue counters, is that there is a giant plug,, and a hole where "something" should be. We didn't have a FRIDGE!!!! To make it an even better story is that the housing lady (who was making sure that we could get in) said

"Well that's funny. It was here yesterday."

Yeah. That's really funny lady! She said she would "get back to us" about the fridge. I was NOT going to go very long without cold storage. I have ice cream to worry about! She called back a bit later, telling us that the maintenance people had noticed the motor had gone out in the other one, so they were planning on replacing it before the new tenants were scheduled to move it.

Who are these new tenants? And I hope they don't snore.

Not only did we NOT HAVE A FRIDGE! (Yes, I know that people buy houses without appliances, but we have no other options for on base housing) My ID was missing. Is missing actually. Big Z is pleading the First born. She didn't do it. z chimped it up and threw it away. (Chopped) We can't find it.

Then there was a HUGE issue with getting a replacement one. Involving me (again) threatening someone with bodily harm, or pulling the "my husband outranks you" card. I hope I never have to play that in situations like that. I can't stand people who do that. That's another rank for another day. An uneventful day.

I moved three loads of stuff and will move a bunch more tomorrow. With help. Because my friends are beyond awesome. It's why I keep them. Their awesomeness.

There will be pictures tomorrow. Of the house. And I'm going to need y'all help. I'm going to have an extra room. Input will be appreciated, but not till tomorrow.

(Little Z pooped in the tub again too. Because it wasn't a crappy enough day!)